Thursday, July 22, 2010

What Would I Do If I Ever Met Steve Perry?

As I mentioned in this post last month, there are a few people with whom I keep in touch quite frequently via email. Our conversations are mainly about Steve Perry, Journey, music in general, Steve Perry, Steve Perry, and Steve Perry. And since some of us in the group are writers, we may link to a piece we've written if we think the others might enjoy it. But every so often, the question of, "What would we do if we ever got the chance to actually meet Steve Perry?" comes up, and my answer is always the same: get a photo op of the two of us doing something completely random and/or ridiculous that's in keeping with this blog. Examples include, but are not limited to, the following:

-Steve and I playing either Connect Four or Battleship
-Steve and I singing a duet at some hole-in-the-wall karaoke bar (The trashier the bar, the better!)
-Steve and I frolicking in a field with adorable puppies (I'm crazy allergic to felines. Sorry, cat lovers.)
-Steve and I getting matching tattoos
-Steve and I in a heated discussion concerning the "Who shot J.R.?" episode of Dallas
-Steve and I painting each other's faces (I want mine to be a tiger--rawr!)

Out of all of those examples, I like the matching tattoos the best. In fact, I like it so much, that I'm going to answer definitively, if I ever met Steve Perry, I'd get pictorial evidence of us getting matching tattoos. Currently, I don't have any tattoos, because there's nothing that I really want on my body permanently, but you can bet your sweet bippy that if an opportunity to get matching tats with Steve Perry ever presented itself, I'd jump on it faster than a cougar on Taylor Lautner.

I can just picture it: It's Monday morning. I'm drinking some coffee and trying to put off going to work for as long as humanly possible. I check my email and see a message from a sender named Steve Perry. It reads: "SVB, you're a cool chick. I think we should meet and get matching tattoos. You in or you out?" I'd be in, Steve. I'd be in so hard, you wouldn't even see it coming, even though you were looking for it. And I realize that last sentence sounds a little naughty, but whatever. You know what I mean.

Now, what kind of tattoos would we get? At first I thought about maybe getting LOMFON (this blog's initials), but quickly nixed the idea. That's giving this blog waaaayyyy too much credit. While it's a fun time-waster, it's not tattoo-worthy. At all.

Then I thought about one of us getting "Don't Stop" and the other getting "Believin'" so that when we put them together, it reads, "Don't Stop Believin'." Kind of like when a couple has twins but can only afford to keep one, but before getting rid of the other, they give them each half a pendant, so when fate brings the twins together later on in life and they see that their halves fit perfectly together, they realize they're long-lost siblings and have an emotional reunion. But that didn't seem right either.

And then I thought, why not go old school and get tats of each other's names? So that's what I decided on. If Steve Perry and I get matching tattoos, it'll be of each other's names. I'll get one on the inside of my wrist that says "Steve Perry" and he'll get one on the inside of his that says "SVB." It'll make people wonder: are we lovers? Are we secretly married? Did we start a singing duet? And then we'll laugh and say, none of the above. We're just pals.

And, like I said before, there would be pictorial evidence, mainly so I could post it here and verify my claim that yes, Steve Perry and I actually got matching tattoos. (Although now that I think about it, getting tats of each other's names doesn't necessarily constitute as matching, but whatever.)

P.S. Also, the tattoos we'd get would be ambigrams because those are too cool for school.

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